The Everyday Apostle - EP016

Transcript

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Welcome to the Everyday Apostle, where ordinary lives meet extraordinary faith.

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Join our host, Kendall Peterson, as we explore how everyday men and women bring the gospel to life wherever they live, work and play.

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Let's dive into it right now.

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Now.

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Hello and welcome to episode 16 of the Everyday Apostle podcast.

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I'm the host, Kendall Peterson.

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Once again, it is my pleasure and my joy to bring these stories of inspiration, of faith and how we're doing all of that in the day-to-day.

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I have a very, very special guest that I'm looking forward to introducing you to.

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But first I would like to give a shout out.

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Making this episode possible today is the generous support of Grant and Michael Miller and Miami's Community Newspapers, whose great studios were in for this episode and whose producers are here, and whose support has been instrumental in all 16 episodes plus that we have put together.

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They are a great source of local news, of relevant, unbiased community news.

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They provide a ton of great content in every medium, from pixels to paper, and they have handy newspapers at the community level, including my favorite, the Kendall Gazette.

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No relation, but thank you once again to Michael and Grant for your graciousness in hosting this podcast.

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Now let's dive into today's show.

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This podcast Now let's dive into today's show.

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Today I have the privilege of introducing a very special guest who I met through a men's retreat group here in Miami Richard Sincore.

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Welcome to the show.

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Thank you very much, Kendall.

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I'm really excited to be here.

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I'm just so grateful that I can share some of my experiences with you.

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Thank you, it's wonderful to have you on, so let me read Richard's bio.

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So Richard is a seasoned investment professional with over two decades of experience navigating the complexities of the financial world.

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Richard has worn many hats throughout his career he's been a fund manager, institutional broker, a trader, financial advisor, and he's worked with both public and private markets.

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His expertise spans nearly every asset class, including alternative investments, derivatives, capital markets and commercial real estate.

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He has worked with investment banks, hedge funds, private equity funds, venture firms, family offices and major institutional investors, helping them all manage risk and build solid financial strategies.

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Today we're going to dive into his journey.

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We're going to dive into his faith and we're going to dive into his perspective on how financial stewardship can align with a life of purpose.

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I know you didn't think so, but it can.

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Richard, welcome to the show.

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Thank you for that intro.

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That was fantastic.

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It's great to have you here, Richard.

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Appreciate it.

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So let's start with the softball question when did you grow up?

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I grew up here in South Florida.

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I had a really nice upbringing in, of course, warm Miami.

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I did a lot of fishing baseball you know, regular kid in South Florida.

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Just a great place to grow up.

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Nice.

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Do you have brothers and sisters?

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baseball.

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You know regular kid in South Florida.

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Just a great place to grow up, nice.

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Do you have brothers and sisters?

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I do, I do.

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I have four brothers and sisters.

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They're all older than me.

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I'm the young one, I'm the baby, the family.

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So yeah, really close.

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You know, of course we're all getting older, but we stay in touch the best that we can.

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Good Are your siblings here in the Miami area as well.

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Well, I have one older brother that's in the Miami area and the rest of them they're actually they're in Florida, but Northern Florida.

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Okay, do you get to see them very?

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often Not as often as I'd like, because you know I like to keep close to the family, but yeah, often enough.

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And we share holidays together, so that's real nice.

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So yeah, and how about your parents?

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my parents.

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They both passed on, but yeah, they're.

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My mother was a Cuban, my father Italian and yeah.

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So in that, that different mix, but yeah it was.

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You know I missed them, of course, but it was, they were great parents.

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Yeah, yeah they.

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They gave me a lot of guidance and direction and they gave me that spirit of guidance and direction and they gave me that spiritual foundation.

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Didn't continue it through, but that's later, probably part of the story that we would tell later.

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So if, if I kind of gleaned from what you just said so there was a certain level of spiritual foundation when you were growing up, yeah, absolutely.

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You know we're a part of the Catholic faith.

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As far as you know, we went to church on Sunday, kind of like.

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I guess you call them, you know, was it seasonal or vacation Catholics, something to that effect.

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But we, I did my first communion, but after that point on, I was about 10, 11 years old I pretty much fell off and kind of went my own direction, kind of Right, didn't stay plugged into the church.

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Okay, not an uncommon story.

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Yeah, yeah.

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Fortunately recoverable right.

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Yeah, in a big way Grand slam.

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So there you go.

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Yeah, so you went to school the whole time here in South Florida.

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I did, I did.

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I went to public schools here and had a great education.

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Then I went away to University of Florida.

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So I'm Floridian, I'm a Gator.

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So those of you who don't like Gators, sorry, but you know, go Gators.

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Any, did you manage to go to church at all when you were in UF?

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I did not.

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You know, I didn't.

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I was really away from the spiritual life.

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I didn't have god at the center of my life in any way.

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Uh, unfortunately, I always felt like there was a god that was present and I had that.

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Of course, the the seed was planted by my parents but uh, no, I, I didn't do it.

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You know, regretfully to say, but yeah, just waiting to bloom later yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah absolutely.

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So I would imagine, just based on the bio, you studied some form of finance or accounting or something.

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Yeah, finance undergrad.

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After that it did real well, went to the securities market, became a broker and performed really well.

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You know that was really what I made as my focus and my not really passion, but more of my idol was you know the wealth I can create and the power it created, and you know how I can control people.

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Yeah.

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It's unfortunate, but that's kind of where I was at.

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That's a common God in the world, right yeah yeah, absolutely Any.

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did you feel any like pulls toward maybe something different or toward your faith at all?

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That's a great question, Kendall.

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Yeah, so I absolutely did.

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But what it was for me is I always felt like what I was doing was empty.

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I would get to the next milestone and I was doing really well, and it just didn't do it for me.

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So, you know, that was my idol.

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And then I had, of course, you know, external coping mechanisms that I used as well.

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So what really pulled me to the faith was, of course, a series of events that kind of lined up where it was just too big for me to control and handle Right.

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Are you comfortable talking about those events?

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Yeah, sure, absolutely.

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So what was going on?

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That kind of shook you up.

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Yeah, so I did about 18 years as institutional sales trader and covering institutions in a senior position and was well into seven figures and doing really well.

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But things changed abruptly all within one year.

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My parents, you know they passed and you know, uh, we had, um, we were acquired by our firm and I had to go ahead and move to another firm and unfortunately we had some big financial hits.

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And then we came to a point where, you know, after my parents and my career and and you know the funds that I accumulated over for many, many years my own took a major, major hit in the market.

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That pretty much sealed the deal, where I felt like I couldn't control it and you know, I wanted to go ahead and put something bigger and stronger at the center of my life.

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So let's talk about that a little bit emotionally.

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What did that feel like in that, in that time?

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What were you, what were you wrestling with?

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00,00,00.

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Man, you know, I felt like my whole world fell apart.

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I felt like the walking dead.

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I didn't have any reason to continue.

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I also learned I was engaged and you know, I was divorced and, yeah, I just felt like I was completely alone.

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Uh, my parents are gone.

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You know my purpose, which was money and all the control that goes along with it.

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I couldn't turn to that to cope.

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So what was going on was I just felt completely out of control.

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The anxiety was tremendous.

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Um, you know, I just felt completely lost in a dark place.

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What kind of things were you, uh were you relying on to try and manage that anxiety?

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And that stress.

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Um, yeah, I mean, you know um, women, um, and, and, unfortunately, and you know exploitation in that sense, uh, and you know exploitation in that sense.

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And alcohol, not really drugs, but it was mostly, you know alcohol, partying, doing things I shouldn't be doing.

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Typical masking trying to hide behind.

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Total mask.

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I was hiding completely.

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Everything was fine, I had it under control, until it spiraled out of control where I just could not control it and I just it was bigger than me and I had to break down and um, and that's kind of what led me back to the faith.

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It was the the.

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The crazy thing is is that I was being pursued the whole time by my God, and he's closer than you know, than we think, all the time, and I kind of felt that though.

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Um, but I always tried to control it.

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I did it my way and you know, I failed miserably at it and, uh, it got to the point where I just said, listen, I don't want to do this anymore.

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I need to go ahead and give up and, um, you know, surrender and trust and have faith.

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Well, spoiler alert Richard, we all do the same thing and we all fail at it.

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So that's why we're here, right?

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Yeah, that's why we're here, absolutely.

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So it's interesting.

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You said that you felt I guess probably retrospectively you felt like God was in pursuit.

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What little tells do you have that.

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That was oh wow, that's a great question as well.

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Oh wow, that's a great question as well.

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When I was in high school, even, there was a counselor who took a liking to me and really took me under his wing and guided me through the same retreat that we're involved in now and to the same parish.

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I didn't know that, so for me, he was pursuing me the whole time.

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There was someone else that I met, while my mother, unfortunately, was passing, who led me to the same exact location as that person, and I thought that was just amazing.

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God was pursuing me the whole time and some of the decisions I made I knew they were the wrong decisions and I still made them because I wanted to control and it satisfied my needs temporarily, right, it was the coping mechanisms, although I knew they were wrong morally, yeah, and I still did them and they didn't turn out well, I could tell you so.

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But anyway, it's clear.

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Looking back, I could see the actual path.

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It's just amazing how God was there the whole time, the whole time, and I just did not want to control it myself.

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And now, as soon as I actually, you know, kind of cross that line where I said okay, god, I'm going to give it to you, I'm going to, I'm going to give up all my anxiety, I'm going to give up all my worries, problems, troubles, to you and I'm going to trust and have faith.

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And then my anxiety subsided.

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No medication, um, my worries, my peace came back to me and pretty much was born again in a lot of ways, not only spiritually, but, you know, my physical health improved and then the fellowship that I have now and the life that I have now is just amazing, with Trader for Anything.

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So take me back to that day, the day you made that decision, the day that you laid that out.

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What did that look like?

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Wow, the day that you laid that out.

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What did that look like?

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Wow?

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Uh, it was actually a phone call that I made because I broke down and I just I was praying in, you know, on my knees in my room.

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Uh, I didn't know what I was going to do.

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Um, I, I just didn't want to live anymore.

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It was that bad, um.

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But then I made a phone call because I was given a phone number, a name, by a gentleman that was at the same facility where my mother was at in skilled nursing and his wife was there as well, and he handed me this name and phone number.

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He said give this person a call when the shit excuse my language hits the fan, because it will.

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It's not a matter of if it's when, because we're all going to get older, right, our bodies aren't going to hold up.

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We have loved ones that are going to pass.

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So at some point you're going to experience trials and tribulations.

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Give this person a call, blown away, you know, out of church.

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And then the rest is history.

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He plugged me in and you know it was a slow process.

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He plugged me in but little by little I kept with it and God, you know he was.

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I learned how to put God at the center of my life, and he guided me through the process.

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So let me see if I get that right.

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So your mother, failing hell, she's in a facility.

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Yeah, there's another guy there.

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you're just kind of randomly talking to yeah, and I'm blowing them off because I don't want to go to church.

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I don't believe.

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You know.

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No Bible thumpers for me.

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So that's kind of that was my thought process, and he gave you a name and a number and said it's going to happen.

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It's going to happen oh yeah, so how long between that moment and when you actually found that card?

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Six months.

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Really.

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Yes.

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You held on to it that long.

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Yeah.

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And then you called I was feeling it though.

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Oh yeah.

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I was feeling it because of the losses, the loved ones.

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You know they're tremendous.

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There's other things that happened in my life that I found out, that I didn't know, and you know, with the divorces and not having a family and so, but yeah, the losses were tremendous, they were mounting and I can control it and I didn't have the coping mechanisms anymore.

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I didn't have the career and you know, making the crazy money and traveling all over the world and all the anxiety I can create for myself.

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So I can go ahead and stress over it.

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Right, that would keep me busy.

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But, um, so I was.

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I was forced to face myself and and, uh, you know, look at myself and deal with myself.

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and it was, it was an ugly picture so you're on your knees, you pick up the phone and you dial this number of this guy.

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You have no idea who it is.

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I have no idea who this person is, but this other person that I was speaking to in the nursing facility, he was there for his wife.

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I respected him tremendously.

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He was trying to do good for me.

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I didn't even go to his church but he told me another church to go to and the person I need to call to go there.

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And that person was the right person to call.

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And man, was he right?

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It was powerful.

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Changed my life.

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What was that like?

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What was that change?

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like.

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I mean the change was like it wasn't immediate, it was a seed that was planted.

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But the peace of the people that I met remember I was building a castle on sand and I built a really big castle.

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I got blown down easily when things hit the fan, but the peace I got from these gentlemen, these people that I met, along with the person I called who also did the same thing, he was able to help me rebuild the foundation to rebuild that castle once again.

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So what it was like was it was that sense of peace.

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Through them, they were the face of Christ for me.

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So, man, those moments, no matter how many times I hear it or how many variations of the story and you know, I experienced it myself Like it's unbelievable how he just shows up when we're ready and turns things around just emotionally.

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And there's just something that happens internally that you can't attribute to alcohol, drugs, women, cars, houses, anything else.

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We try and I had all those and none of that filled it and they were all temporary.

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This was a permanent feeling of peace and I said I want what those guys have, I want what they have.

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And then, yeah, little by little, you know I wanted to be that, you know that face for others.

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Right.

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So then comes the fun part.

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You've got to rebuild your life now, right yeah?

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Yeah, yeah.

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So what was that like?

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How, how do you go about that?

00:17:53.186 --> 00:17:54.457
How did you go about that?

00:17:54.457 --> 00:17:55.960
What tools did you use?

00:17:55.960 --> 00:18:01.229
And how have you tried to not rebuild the same house on the same sand?

00:18:01.494 --> 00:18:02.336
That's a great question.

00:18:02.336 --> 00:18:14.298
Well, first, you have to really surrender and not try to control, and try to negotiate and deal with the center, the person that you have, the center of your life, which is, you know which, for me, is God.

00:18:14.298 --> 00:18:27.366
So, um and uh, create a, a real relationship with Christ on a daily basis and that meant, you know, scheduling time to create that relationship.

00:18:30.557 --> 00:18:48.525
Once that happened, before any of the other losses can actually, you know, be rebuilt I had to really understand, to let go, surrender, have faith and trust and really put God at the center of my life, my spiritual walk.

00:18:48.525 --> 00:19:00.969
And once I did that, things just started to click, meeting the right people, just, and you know the right books, the right therapy, and just became a new person.

00:19:00.969 --> 00:19:03.597
And there's a book you know that I read.

00:19:03.597 --> 00:19:06.954
I don't know if I could say yeah, yeah, it's by father Richard Rohr.

00:19:06.954 --> 00:19:10.107
It's called falling upward and the second half of life.

00:19:10.107 --> 00:19:12.857
And that's pretty much what happened to me.

00:19:12.857 --> 00:19:18.240
I had to get hit with a sledgehammer, unfortunately, but that's what it took for me.

00:19:18.240 --> 00:19:31.500
That's what it took for me in order to go ahead and really rebuild the right way and I'm a new man and a different person and so much better and so much wiser and really I love who I am now.

00:19:32.603 --> 00:19:36.615
Let's talk a little bit about that change, right?

00:19:36.615 --> 00:19:52.943
Because we're I mean, we're close to the same age, so we live with the past versions of ourselves for quite a while, and I know for me that it wasn't an instantaneous change, Like suddenly I was a radically new person.

00:19:52.943 --> 00:19:53.506
I was just.

00:19:53.506 --> 00:19:56.863
I had a new feeling but, I had a lot of old habits.

00:19:57.505 --> 00:19:59.590
Certainly no, that's a great point.

00:19:59.590 --> 00:20:01.939
Uh, once again, the seeds were planted.

00:20:01.939 --> 00:20:07.056
I saw the face of Christ and others and I saw their peace and I wanted that.

00:20:07.056 --> 00:20:14.397
You know, I wanted that, no matter what, my foundation needed to be solid enough so it can weather any storm, right?

00:20:14.397 --> 00:20:34.544
So, um, in order to do that, um, you know it was straining, you know it's work, but it's work where you know you're doing this for the long run and it's not a temporary fix and it's work with peace and purpose.

00:20:34.544 --> 00:20:38.857
And, man, I was hooked and this is.

00:20:38.857 --> 00:20:47.324
I would never I mean 10 years ago, in a million years think that I would be in this position saying this.

00:20:47.324 --> 00:21:03.424
But, however, I really got to the point where I said listen, there's got to be a better way, otherwise I'm going to self-destruct in a bad way and then affect a lot of others too along the way.

00:21:04.635 --> 00:21:17.409
So you're a professional finance industry not exactly known for the kind of life that you're now trying to build right.

00:21:18.069 --> 00:21:26.325
Yeah, well, yeah, it was all about numbers and performance and returns, and you know um, 100%, Um.

00:21:26.325 --> 00:21:31.699
There is another side, though, um, the side, and you mentioned the stewardship and helping others.

00:21:31.699 --> 00:21:38.161
Actually, you know, not only do well financially, um, but also you can.

00:21:38.161 --> 00:22:19.800
There's places and ways of using skill sets that you create in the financial industry that have purpose and there's impact investing, for example, you can, you know, um, invest in technology that's trying to improve or solve a societal ill or problem and uh, really, that's, you know that's been my focus, and, and the people that I meet on a daily basis when they see what I have, you know it's not perfect, it's always, it's still work on a daily basis, but, um, they, they want to do business with me and I certainly didn't do this for the business, but, and anything is possible's a it's a whole different feel.

00:22:19.800 --> 00:22:21.963
Completely, it's not toxic like it was before.

00:22:23.266 --> 00:22:47.586
so, um, you know it's, uh, it's, it's rooted in the foundation, is, is, is, it's light and beautiful so I heard um something a long time ago that kind of sticks with me continuously and that is if you were on trial for being a Christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you?

00:22:47.586 --> 00:22:53.942
And quite honestly, there hasn't always been.

00:22:53.942 --> 00:22:56.906
I'd like to think there is for me.

00:22:56.906 --> 00:23:07.750
But what do you think the outside world sees in this new version of Richardson Corps, who's more at peace and trying to head in the right direction?

00:23:07.750 --> 00:23:08.451
What do you think?

00:23:08.451 --> 00:23:10.178
The outward version?

00:23:10.178 --> 00:23:11.742
How does that look different to the world?

00:23:13.671 --> 00:23:19.440
On the surface they may be, say and act like they're shocked or even kind of turned off by it.

00:23:19.440 --> 00:23:26.853
But down deep, because they were me or if they're where I'm at now, then they wouldn't feel that way.

00:23:26.853 --> 00:23:27.094
Right.

00:23:27.094 --> 00:23:39.612
But if they were who I was before, they would know down deep, if they were true to themselves, that he's walking the right path and I want that.

00:23:39.612 --> 00:23:42.356
So it doesn matter.

00:23:42.356 --> 00:23:48.174
I don't mind being vulnerable with them because I know I'm doing my purpose and trying to.

00:23:48.174 --> 00:24:01.558
You know again, I don't know how much we can say here, but you know I like to be the face of Christ and you know, glorify God through improving and helping others.

00:24:01.558 --> 00:24:10.076
You know others solve whatever ailments or whatever it is they're dealing with in life and have that peace that I have.

00:24:10.439 --> 00:24:10.558
Right.

00:24:11.330 --> 00:24:12.696
So, yeah, what does it look like?

00:24:12.696 --> 00:24:15.278
Yeah, they're probably shocked and a little turned off.

00:24:15.278 --> 00:24:33.010
And I get guys hey, it's not like I'm thumping, but because of my example and the way I'm living my life, I see them with a different level of respect for me and treating me different and talking to me different and wanting to follow me, and that's powerful.

00:24:33.571 --> 00:24:35.674
Yeah, that's for sure.

00:24:35.674 --> 00:24:47.395
So what are some of the tools that you use to kind of maintain your trajectory on that walk and and what's your I don't know daily rituals?

00:24:47.455 --> 00:24:49.403
yeah, that's that's a great question.

00:24:49.403 --> 00:24:59.921
Yeah, I do morning devotion myself and I I live, I try to live in gratitude and be grateful, like, for example, this show and being able to go ahead and and really, um, you know, share this with everybody.

00:24:59.921 --> 00:25:06.893
Um, so that gratitude, every morning, as soon as I wake up, I do my morning devotions about for a half hour.

00:25:06.893 --> 00:25:15.845
That includes, actually, the Halo app I know one of your guests was, you know, one of the founders and it's fantastic, it's phenomenal.

00:25:16.247 --> 00:25:34.154
I use it on a daily basis and then, of course, I read, I read scripture, I go to mass, you know, on Sundays, and then I participate in different ministries and and fellowships, and, like one, the retreat that we're talking about, that you and I we met at um.

00:25:34.154 --> 00:25:54.211
There's another one, so it's, it's a big part of my life, but I bring that into, you know, the, the, my, my work life as well, in the sense of you know the, the, my, my work life as well, and the sense of you know always smiling and trying to, to, to be that positive, peaceful person and have that attitude of gratitude, so that others can see that as well.

00:25:55.031 --> 00:25:55.673
That's awesome.

00:25:55.673 --> 00:26:05.125
Um any, any words of advice for maybe folks in the same business as you?

00:26:05.125 --> 00:26:13.337
I mean, it doesn't really matter what industry they're in, we're all struggling in the same way, Sure 100%.

00:26:15.454 --> 00:26:21.958
Yeah, if your focus is on the money and the returns, it's not going to be fulfilling.

00:26:21.958 --> 00:26:25.250
At some point you're going to get to where you're not going to want to do this anymore.

00:26:25.250 --> 00:26:35.095
My advice is to maybe utilize some of those funds or your skills to a ministry or helping others in the community and really giving back.

00:26:35.095 --> 00:26:52.721
That way it's going to feel great for you and it's going to help others and you'll be doing a great service to not only your fellow person and a neighbor, it's one of the commandments that we were left behind right, but for yourself, spiritual healing for yourself.

00:26:53.690 --> 00:27:04.722
So finance industry can be very cutthroat and toxic, but again, it shouldn't be the focus and purpose, my advice, my thoughts of your life.

00:27:04.722 --> 00:27:14.621
It should be what helps you get to what you really where you want to be, and that's, of course, you know family, friends and you know the ministries and giving back.

00:27:14.621 --> 00:27:18.781
But in the end, you know, what do we really have?

00:27:18.781 --> 00:27:21.520
In the end, it's really all about the love you've given others.

00:27:22.285 --> 00:27:26.796
Right, great advice, richard, and thank you for sharing that.

00:27:26.796 --> 00:27:28.098
Thank you for sharing your story.

00:27:28.098 --> 00:27:29.227
Oh, wow, this is fantastic.

00:27:29.247 --> 00:27:31.557
Thank you, as I warned you we're at the end.

00:27:31.557 --> 00:27:34.176
Oh, okay, well, I had a great time, so thank you.

00:27:37.151 --> 00:27:38.978
Man, thank you for sharing that story.

00:27:38.978 --> 00:27:46.901
It's a common story, but thank you for sharing your personal details along the way.

00:27:46.901 --> 00:27:53.741
And what's amazing is you can go through those hardships, you can go through the challenges and you can go through those moments of isolation and desperation.

00:27:53.741 --> 00:28:02.481
And then you have this on the other end, which is great, and you and I both know the world's full of guys like us that have gone through it.

00:28:03.510 --> 00:28:07.721
And now we can band together and help each other, which is amazing.

00:28:07.721 --> 00:28:20.193
So, for those of you listening or watching, thank you once again for the prayers, thank you for the messages of inspiration and the encouragement to keep this going.

00:28:20.193 --> 00:28:25.478
It's not the easiest thing, on top of a job and a family and everything else, to to manage this going.

00:28:25.478 --> 00:28:27.569
It's not the easiest thing, on top of a job and a family and everything else, to manage a podcast.

00:28:27.569 --> 00:28:35.923
I am eternally grateful for Grant and Michael and our producer staff that we have here.

00:28:35.923 --> 00:28:38.798
That really take a heavy load for me.

00:28:38.798 --> 00:28:57.563
If you are inspired by Richard's story or any of the other stories we've had and you would like to sponsor this podcast, please feel free to reach out on everydayapostlecom and until then, I encourage you guys to stay true to your faith.

00:28:57.563 --> 00:29:04.856
Stay in prayer, pray for us for sure, and I will see you on the next episode.

00:29:04.856 --> 00:29:06.961
God bless, god bless.

00:29:07.671 --> 00:29:10.180
Thanks for tuning in to the Everyday Apostle.

00:29:10.180 --> 00:29:18.942
Don't forget to like and subscribe on YouTube, on your favorite podcast outlet, and at our website at everydayapostlecom.

00:29:18.942 --> 00:29:22.400
Until next time, stay blessed.

The Everyday Apostle - EP016 - Richard Sincore